This is Me, and my Conversation with the Mormon Missionaries…Thanks to My Sister, Lala for Posting


  1. Door: Knock Knock
  2. Missionary: “Hi, we’re missionaries from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints! Mind if we speak with you for a moment?”
  3. Brother: I respond by staring blankly, with a look of malice
  4. Missionary: “Have you ever seen missionaries like us before?”
  5. Brother: More evil stares, teeth bared
  6. Missionary: “What church do you belong to?”
  7. Brother: “I’m a Pagan”
  8. Missionary: “Oh…well…um…”
  9. Brother: “I’m not kidding, and I know my bible better than you or anyone you know”
  10. Missionary: “Well, have you ever read the—“
  11. Brother: “Book of Mormon? Yes. It’s worse than the bible”
  12. Missionary: “What did you find offensive about it?”
  13. Brother: “The part that starts at the front cover and ends with “amen”.”
  14. Missionary: “Well, sir…”
  15. Brother: “Well, let me explain something to you…I am a third shift worker, and I don’t wake up until 4 pm. Do me or others of my religion show up and wake you up 2 hours before you normally wake up to tell you things you don’t care about?”
  16. Missionary: “Well, no, but we feel–“
  17. Brother: “you feel you have the right to ‘witness’ to me about something for which i have no use? is that it?”
  18. Missionary: “okay, well, we are sorry to disturb you, but–“
  19. Brother: “I’m sorry you disturbed me as well, have a nice day, hail satan, goodbye” and then I closed the door.
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